Gomez lives off generational wealth and thus spends his time culturing himself with dance, art, and seductive languages.
I work until it’s not safe to drive home because I’m so tired and my eyes don’t work. I crawl home on surface streets, collapse into bed for a brief nap, and get up to go do it again because the man needs his dollar.
My spirit may be willing, but my flesh is spongy and bruised.
Idk man that sounds pretty macabre. Are you sure you’re not going for a goth chick? /s
How much time to put a little product in your hair?
How hard is it to listen to a language lesson instead of that song you’ve heard a million times?
Get some nice collared shirts instead of fanboy T-shirts?
Watch one how to dance video?
Product - use daily
Language - speak English, Spanish, and Korean, though the latter two are admittedly falling off from lack of use. Lived overseas for four years in my twenties
Collared shirts - wear daily, but I’d guess that’s not goth chick bait
Dancing - was religiously prohibited from such growing up and never took an interest in it
Personal skill - I can cook like a motherfucker. Like really good stuff. If I believed in love languages, mine would be feeding others. The women in my office make weekly requests for me to cook whatever they’re craving over the weekend and bring it in on Monday.
But I’m talking about energy. Gomez spends his entire existence striving toward being Morticia’s everything. I don’t have enough gas in the tank after seventy or eighty hours of getting yelled at for my income.
Next up, since everything is so easy, I guess I just simply waltz into another job, right?
Have you tried applying for Civil Service jobs?
“How long has it been since we’ve waltzed?”
“Oh, Gomez…hours.”
I’m not goth, but my husband treats me like Gomez treats Morticia. Can confirm that a lot of sex happens. So, like, do it.
Can confirm they fuck a lot
Nice.
This is the way.
“You scared me… I want you to do it again.”
I’m a Gomez at heart but more of a Fester in the looks department.
The key to Gomez energy is his sincerity. You might not be able to draw a Morticia (because she’s probably already got a Gomez) but a Fester with sincerity who aims with his heart rather than his eyes/dick has a good chance of finding true love.
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He finds someone afterward anyway, someone who’s much better for him
Debbie!
According to the first movie, Fester was more of a ladies man than Gomez, or at least that’s what Gomez thought.
Gomez was never supposed to be good looking.
Original Gomez:
Money solves that part. In rare cases charisma pulls you out, but that’s much harder to achieve.
I’m more of a cousin Itt in the looks department while being a Gomez at heart
But I feel you friend
So you are a member of ZZ Top?
Every girl crazy 'bout a sharp-dressed man 🤷♂️
As fun as Wednesday’s show was, these two were just the quintessence of the roles
Their competition wasn’t that fierce, Luis Guzman is a great actor, especially when being comical, but he very much is NOT Gomez Addams. But no matter who it was, I doubt they’d be able to beat Raul Julia or Anjelica Huston.
The legendary John Astin and Carolyn Jones might like a word!
That show was just weird as hell to watch growing up, along with The Munsters and to a lesser extent Bewitched.
To be fair, their movie portrayals were amazing too.
I’d love Johnny Depp and Winona Ryder to take it on.
Only if Johnny plays Morticia and Winona plays Gomez
Oh my God now I want this so much.
It also doesn’t hurt that Anjelica is always illuminated like she’s from another movie altogether (credit to CinemaTherapy). The director turned the glamor factor up to 11 in every scene without breaking anything. It’s impossible to follow that.
Raul, somehow, manages to be a complete ham yet relatable, lovable, and most importantly, believable.
Debbie Jellinsky: [meeting Gomez] Isn’t he a lady-killer!
Gomez: Acquitted!
The writing was so exemplary. And it’s one of those deals where the sequel is actually better than the first eg Gremlins, Shrek, Bad Boys
Is she truly a goth GF if she isn’t big tiddy
Yes.
Isn’t Tish like… the OG goth GF
Things evolved
The fact that “big titty goth girlfriend” is a phrase means that having big titties is not a requirement to be a goth girlfriend. No one says “athletic Olympic champion wrestler.”
Apart from the Mediterranean Italian Roman philosopher Tautologous the Redundant
Meh.
Freedom is better than marriage. Bachelorhood is underrated.
You’re being downvoted by people that can’t be alone with themselves.
Yup.
That’s okay. They’ll remember me when they wake up next to someone who hates them and they have two or three screaming children that won’t let them sleep.
